Swansea City vs. Cardiff City: Monk-ey Business

Stop me if you've heard this one before...

The owner of a Welsh club in the English Premier League decided to sack a highly-successful manager in an undignified fashion.

Sounds familiar, no?  

I'm not talking about former Cardiff City manager Malky Mackay.  This time around it was Swansea City manager Michael Laudrup who got the axe.  

For those of you keeping score at home, that is now seven managers gone this season (six fired, one allegedly left by "mutual consent").

Official statements given by Swansea City say Laudrup was fired because the board weren't happy with the direction the club was going (apparently 12th place wasn't the direction they wanted to go) and they also weren't happy with the attitude of players in the locker room.  

In a recent statement, issued via the League Managers Association, Laudrup stated "I am deeply disappointed to have been dismissed as manager of Swansea City.  In particular, the manner in which it happened and the actions the club has taken since notifying me in the briefest of letters which gave no reasons why such hasty and final action was deemed necessary".

At least Cardiff City owner Vincent Tan had the courtesy to issue an explicitly-detailed breakdown of why he thought Mackay sucked at his job.

I bring this up not to gloat about the plight of the Jacks, but because it created an interesting storyline leading into the second edition of the Premier League South Wales Derby.

When Malky Mackay was sacked by Vincent Tan, his temporary replacement was then Assistant Manager David Kerslake.  Swansea City took a different approach after Laudrup's firing.  They chose to name Garry monk, the current Swansea City captain, as club manager for an indefinite period of time.

When my wife and I sat down to watch the game on Saturday morning, I told her about the bizarre case of picking an active player to lead the club for such a historic event.  She mentioned that the Boston Celtics did something similar when they chose Bill Russell as coach in the mid-to-late Sixties.

Since sports trivia isn't my strong suit (see also my recent collapse on the Built on Sloper Rd. podcast's trivia segment), I decided to do a little digging to see how common player-managers are in Premier League and in US major league sports.  Here's a list of the most recent example in each sport:

• Premier League - Stuart McCall (Bradford City, 2000/01 season)
• MLB - Pete Rose (Cincinnati Reds, 1986 season)
• NBA - Lenny Wilkens (Portland Trailblazers, 1974/75 season)
• NFL - Tom Landry (New York Giants, 1954 season)
• NHL - Charlie Burns (Minnesota North Stars, 1969/70 season)

So the Premier League has had this same situation arise relatively recently in its history, but a similar situation has not occurred in an American major league sport in almost thirty years.  It's apparently possible that it could happen again in MLB, NFL, or NHL though; only the NBA has explicitly banned the practice.

Garry Monk took over Swansea with just days to prepare for their match against Cardiff City.  How did he do in his managerial debut?  Regretably, pretty darn well...

Excerpt from "Garry Monk" Wikipedia entry on 02/09/14 

Swansea City 3 - Cardiff City 0

• Routledge (SWA) 47' 
• Dyer (SWA) 79'
• Bony (SWA) 85'

Truly a performance so flaccid that it deserves a Viagra commercial.

Normally, I would give you some commentary on this match that would highlight the positives of the Bluebirds' performance.  But honestly, there's really nothing good to say.  

I thought that Cardiff City appeared to have reverted to the "park the bus and try not to lose" mentality from earlier this season.  Everything good I saw in the match against Norwich City last week appeared to have evaporated.

Also, some of the player selections for this week were confusing to me.  If I had been appointed as manager of the Bluebirds prior to this match (I have no idea what dire situation would have lead to this), I would have started Theophile-Catherine, McNaughton, Noone, and Mutch in place of Turner, Fabio, Kim, and Whittingham respectively.

To make matters even worse Craig Bellamy, who has had a resurgence in the past two weeks, apparently punched Swansea City player Jonathan de Guzman during the match and now faces a potential three-match ban.

(Image Credit:  SkySports1)

I didn't see the incident live and neither did referee Andre Marriner.  The issue was raised post-match and the Football Association had a panel review the footage.  They came to the conclusion that the punch was in fact intentional and charged Bellamy with violent conduct.

Bellamy has until Tuesday evening to respond to the charge.  As of the writing of this post, I'm not sure what options are available to Cardiff City in terms of appealing the decision.  Stay tuned.

With this loss, the Bluebirds are in 19th place with 5 wins, 6 draws, and 14 losses.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 02/11/14.  The table columns are:  Current Position (POS), Last Position (LP), Club Name (CLUB), Matches Played (P), Wins (W), Draws (D), Losses (L), Goals Fielded (GF), Goals Allowed (GA), Goal Differential (GD), and Rankings Points (PTS).

I don't want this blog to dwell on bad results and negativity.  One thing that I've found helps me to deal with Premier League-driven grief is to connect with other Bluebirds fans via Twitter.  I've been fortunate enough to bump into several of these who like me live in the United States.    

Please enjoy this new (hopefully weekly) segment of "Meet a US Bluebird"!

Meet Ian Paterson-Jones (@IanPJ1927, 02/08/14)

Where do you live and where are you from originally?:  Lake Mary, FL (near Orlando).  Originally from Cardiff.

How long have you been following the Bluebirds and how did you become a fan?:  Since the early 70s.  Grandfather and father were fans.

What is your most favorite Cardiff City memory and why?:  Winning 2nd division playoff final against QPR.  One of the last times I went with my dad.

Who is your most favorite current Cardiff City player?  If you could add any one player to the roster right now who would it be?:  Gary Medel.  I think Ole has everything covered at the moment.

What makes Cardiff City important to you?:  Part of my life.

What is your favorite US sport and team?  Do you follow any MLS clubs?:  Football, Florida Gators.  No just like to watch MLS games and learn about the teams and players.  But with Orlando City joining MLS in 2016.

Do you think Premier League is growing in popularity in the US?  What can NBC or the League itself do to grow its popularity in the US?:  Yes I do.  More teams coming to US for pre-season games.

Thank you for the interview, Ian.  Even though we lost to the Jacks this past week, I do believe you're correct that Ole has everything covered.  We have all the players we need to survive this season, they just need to step up and perform to their potential.

You know who is stepping up to their potential?  My fantasy team, the Cardiff'rent Strokes.  They are continuing their climb to the top 1,000,000 of the Fantasy Premier League slowly but surely...  

• Rank (Last Week):  1,305,836
• Rank (This Week):  1,299,164
• Total Players:  3,174,038

Well that's it for this week, readers.  Cardiff City's next Premier League match is on February 11th at home against Aston Villa.

Thank you as always for reading.  You can follow me on Twitter @dragon_bluebird.  And feel free to leave some comments on my posts via Blogger or Twitter.  Would love to hear your thoughts on the season so far and I'm always open to suggestions for features or topics you'd like to see on this blog.

Cardiff City vs. Manchester United/Norwich City: Kenwyne Can Win

Like every other American that does not live in the state of Washington, I deeply regret having spent several hours of my life watching the Super Bowl this past weekend.  I didn't care who won, the game was a blowout, and the commercials were underwhelming.  

Thankfully I own a DVR, so I didn't miss Puppy Bowl X.

For those of you in the UK and elsewhere who may not watch American football, this was supposed to be an exciting, close game.  The Seattle Seahawks were the best defensive team (i.e. fewest points allowed) in the NFL this season.  The Denver Broncos were the best offensive team (i.e. most points fielded) in the NFL this season.  Actually, the Broncos were the best offensive team of any NFL season.

So it was pretty shocking to see the game end in a 43-8 rout by the Seahawks.  It would be something like if the Manchester City-Chelsea game this past Monday was played on the last day of the Premier League season, with the two teams tied at the top of the standings, and having the match end 1-6 instead of 0-1.

While I didn't enjoy the game, I did enjoy this Super Bowl-related internet gem...

"Football!"  (Image Credit:  @SirPatStew)

Sir Patrick Stewart and Sir Ian McKellen, in Seahawks and Broncos jerseys respectively, holding a soccer ball.  The only way that picture could have been more awesome is if the bluish ghost of Sir Alex Guinness were hovering in the background in a 49ers jersey.

For those of you who didn't get a degree in engineering and spend 11 years in industry praying that someone would hire you to build the starship Enterprise, let me break it down for you:

• Patrick Stewart:  Gurney Halleck (Dune), Captain Jean-Luc Picard (Star Trek:  The Next Generation), and Professor Charles Xavier (X-Men)
• Ian McKellen:  Gandalf (Hobbit and Lord of the Rings) and Magneto (X-Men)
• Alex Guinness (Not pictured but unquestionably there in spirit):  Obi-Wan Kenobi (Star Wars)

@SirPatStew and @IanMcKellen I had no idea that you were comic geniuses as well as science fiction legends.  Well-played, Sirs.

Nerd gushing completed...man, what a segue.

Let's talk some Cardiff City! 

Before we get to the matches from this past week, I wanted to thank the gentlemen-scholars of the Built on Sloper Rd podcast for having me as a guest.  

The "Built on Sloper Rd" podcast and blog logo

If you're not already listening to Built on Sloper Rd, drop what you're doing and go subscribe to their podcast!  They are a bunch of really great guys and they upload two podcasts a week covering Cardiff City matches and club shenanigans.  The episode I'm on aired on January 31st and you can find it on iTunes by searching for "BOSR Extra 10".  

By the way, the guys are currently running an eBay auction to support Cardiff City captain Steven Caulker's charity, "Africa's Child".  You can find the details here.

Ok, let's get serious and actually talk about the Bluebirds!

There were two matches this past week.  The first was on January 28th away at Manchester United...

Manchester United 2 - Cardiff City 0

• Van Persie (MUN) 6'
• Young (MUN) 59'

This was Cardiff City manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer's (OGS) first match as manager against his former club.  He received a warm reception, as he was somewhat of a legendary goal scorer at Manchester United...

In case you needed another reason to dislike Manchester United, their mascot is a satanic Care Bear (Image Credit:  mirror.co.uk)

OGS does the Ayatollah, much to David Moyes' chagrin.  Cheeky!  (Image Credit:  mirror.co.uk)

Aside from the return of OGS, the other big storyline of the match was Manchester United's signing of Juan Mata from Chelsea.  Mata is a disgustingly good player that was underutilized at Chelsea.  It's unusual for a player of that caliber to be transferred mid-season between Premier League rivals.  In a way, I think the transfer only went through because Chelsea's manager Jose Mourinho wanted to let David Moyes know that he thinks Manchester United is too crappy to be a title threat.

But it was Robin van Persie, not Juan Mata, back from an 11 match absence who scored first for Manchester United.

While it was conceivable for the Bluebirds to win this match, it wasn't expected and it wasn't a "must win".  I was pleasantly surprised to see that Cardiff City didn't implode on themselves like they have in the past after going down 1-0.  

The Bluebirds actually lead the match in possession, but little else.  I did think there was still a chance for a draw up until Manchester United's Ashley Young scored his goal 59 minutes into the match.

It's not that Cardiff City didn't have any moments of good performance, it's just that overall, like the Super Bowl, it was a pretty dull affair.

This isn't Photoshopp'd, @jodylaforge actually was at the match...in body at least.

Thanks for the pic, Jody!

The BBC Sport match report described the result as a "morale-boosting win" for Manchester United.  It's a pretty sad state of affairs when last year's champions get a morale boost from beating the worst team in the league.  Spoiler Alert...Manchester United would go on to lose their next match against relegation candidates Stoke City.  So much for the morale boost you jerks.

Cardiff City were unlucky in the standings due to other relegation candidates stepping up in their matches.  The Bluebirds were not just in last place at this point, they were in last place with a gap forming.  

Which brings us to the close of the January transfer window.  Just like my coverage of the summer transfer window, I didn't bother telling you much about who might be in or out becuase their is so much misinformation on the internet during this time period.  But it's done now and let's look at what's happened to the roster this season.

Below is a list of everyone who has been transferred in since summer 2013 and out since winter 2014.  I've left off anyone who left before this season began or went out on a brief loan spell during the season just to cut down on confusion...

Transferred-In (Summer 2013), Still Here:

• Steven Caulker
• Gary Medel
• Maximiliano Amondarain
• Kevin Theophile-Catherine

Transferred-In (Summer 2013), Transferred-Out (Winter 2014):

• Andreas Cornelius
• John Brayford (Loan)
• Simon Moore (Loan)
• Peter Odemwingie

Transferred-Out (Winter 2014):

• Rudy Gestede
• Craig Conway
• Filip Kiss (Loan)
• Nicky Maynard (Loan)

Transferred-In (Winter 2014):

• Magnus Wolff Eikrem
• Mats Moller Daehli
• Jo Inge Berget
• Kenwyne Jones
• Fabio
• Wilfried Zaha (Loan)
• Juan Cala

Three players are particularly worth noting from the above lists:  Cornelius, Odemwingie, and Jones.

Andreas Cornelius is the poster child for Vincent Tan's absolute disgust with former Cardiff City Manager Malky Mackay.  Due to a combination of injury and ill-preparedness, Cornelius scored zero goals in his eight appearances.  He was brought in this past summer and was booted out less than six months later.

Peter Odemwingie and Kenwyne Jones are a really interesting transfer story.  Like Cornelius, Odemwingie was brought in over the Summer for exactly one purpose...to score goals.  He managed to score one Premier League goal in his fifteen appearances.  Cardiff City swapped Odemwingie for Stoke City's Jones, which was somewhat of a mystery because Jones had zero goals in seven appearances for Stoke City.  What was OGS thinking?!  

Kenwyne Jones' first Premier League match as a Bluebird was in our second match of the week, at home on February 1st against Norwich City.

Was OGS crazy for swapping one non-scoring goal scorer for another?  Let's find out...

Cardiff City 2 - Norwich City 1

• Snodgrass (NOR) 5'
• Bellamy (CAR) 49'
• Jones (CAR) 50'

I'll give you a moment to pick yourself up off the floor.

Yes, the Bluebirds actually won a match!  Not just any match, a true "must win".  

One minute into the game, Cardiff City rock star Jordon Mutch had a sweet bicycle kick goal attempt that was unfortunately stopped.  This was the signal to me at least that the Bluebirds came to play.

While Cardiff City looked really good on the attack, their defense was a truly confused mess.  Which leads us to the punch-in-the-gut...Norwich City's Robert Snodgrass' goal just 5 minutes into the match.   

It's not supposed to go down like this.  Norwich stinks.  We've bought all these new players.  Defense is supposed to be the one thing we're decent at right?  Not really.  Goalkeeper David Marshall is unquestionably a star, but the downside of OGS' attacking style is that you don't have as many dudes parked in your third of the field.  This is a new style of play for the Bluebirds and they need time to get used to it.

And get used to it they did.  Snodgrass' goal was Norwich City's last.

If there was one Cardiff City player on that field that wanted a win more than any other, it was Craig Bellamy.  His goal at 49 minutes into the match was his first of this Premier League season.  

Craig, and the entire stadium went berserk.

Craig Bellamy...legend.  (Image Credit:  The Guardian)

OGS has been a VERY vocal champion of Bellamy; encouraging him to get fit and continue playing, even though Bellamy himself has said he's running out of gas and is considering a new career in managing.  Smart move OGS.

Which brings us to another smart, if mysterious move by OGS, the signing of Kenwyne Jones.

One minute after Bellamy's goal, although it only seemed like a blink, Kenwyne Jones put in his first goal of the season as well.    

Kenwyne Jones scores the game winner in his Cardiff City debut (Image Credit:  The Guardian)

What followed can only be described as a celebration dance on par with any "fatality move" in Mortal Kombat...

(Image Credit:  Cardiff City FC Official Website)

(Image Credit:  Getty Images)

(Image Credit:  Getty Images)

I fully expected the stadium to shake itself to pieces after that cartwheel-somersault-ayatollah.

The next 40 minutes were the most hotly contested, scrappy scenes I've watched to date.  Both clubs had legitimate attempts, but the lions share came from Norwich City.

I had several minor heart attacks during this time period, the worst of which occurred during two disallowed Norwich City goals.

Whatever David Marshall earns, it's not even close to enough.

At 93:51 one of the commentators said, in reference to Cardiff City "so close [they] could almost touch the three points".

And touch the three points the Bluebirds did.  That's probably terrible grammar, but I don't care.

There was skill in this win, but also several large warehouses worth of luck.

I have never felt more confident about the season than at this moment.  Maybe I will eat my words later, but I feel like this is a new start and the beginning of a hot streak.  And if the skill and confidence disappear and only luck remains so be it as long as Cardiff City don't get relegated.

I really must share with you this Twitter exchange featuring Kenwyne Jones after the match...

Timeless comeback.

As it stands, the Bluebirds are in 19th place with 5 wins, 6 draws, and 13 losses.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 02/04/14.  The table columns are:  Current Position (POS), Last Position (LP), Club Name (CLUB), Matches Played (P), Wins (W), Draws (D), Losses (L), Goals Fielded (GF), Goals Allowed (GA), Goal Differential (GD), and Rankings Points (PTS).

I've never been so happy to be the second worst at something.

Cardiff City have climbed up from 20th to 19th place, and my Fantasy team, the Cardiff'rent Strokes have seen similar improvement...

• Rank (Last Week):  1,337,819
• Rank (This Week):  1,305,836
• Total Players:  3,167,775

So much to talk about this week, apologies for the ridiculously long blog post.  Let's wrap things up.

Cardiff City's next match is away at Swansea City on February 8th.  That's right, the second South Wales Derby in Premier League history.  Neither team has ever "done the double".  But my new found optimism has convinced me that this might be the Bluebirds year of miracles.

A few Twitter shoutouts:

• Built on Sloper Rd:  @BuiltOnSloperRd
• Built on Sloper Rd hosts:  @djr_ccfc, @adam85James, @SteveDE83, @Bennifactor
• Jody Davies:  @jodylaforge, @DodgemXofficial

Thank you as always for reading.  You can follow me on Twitter @dragon_bluebird.  And feel free to leave some comments on my posts via Blogger or Twitter.  Would love to hear your thoughts on the season so far and I'm always open to suggestions for features or topics you'd like to see on this blog.

Manchester City vs. Cardiff City: Keep Calm and Do the Ayatollah

I'm going to rip the bandage off quickly this week, because honestly we're all adults here.  Take a deep breath...

Manchester City 4 - Cardiff City 2

• Dzeko (MCI) 14'
• Noone (CAR) 29'
• Navas (MCI) 33'
• Toure (MCI) 76'
• Aguero (MCI) 79'
• Campbell (CAR) 90'

What, just another Cardiff City loss?  I thought you were going to tell me something awful.

I am.  With this loss, the Bluebirds are officially the worst club in the Premier League.

Oh.  That is pretty awful.  Ouch.

It's going to be ok.  Keep calm and do the Ayatollah.  More on this in a minute.

Coming into this match, the Sky Blues had a perfect 10 win record at home.  The Bluebirds, on the other hand, had a paltry 1 win, 3 draws, 6 losses away record.  This looked like a tall mountain to climb even before you considered Manchester City's tally of 59 goals as compared to Cardiff City's mere 15 goals.

But it is in exactly these kind of situations when the Bluebirds are at their best and even in this defeat there were positive signs to be seen.  

Cardiff City was on the defensive from the moment the game started, but held fast through repeated Manchester City attempts.  

Maybe it is because they are spoiled by success, but the Manchester City fans were completely silent after ten scoreless minutes.  It was at this point in the broadcast that you could hear the Bluebirds away fans doing the Ayatollah chant.

I just looked back through my previous blog posts and I can't believe I haven't yet mentioned Cardiff City's signature gesture/chant.  Let me get you up to speed, god only knows what awkward motions you've been doing in your living rooms while trying to support the Bluebirds!

Maybe you're reading this post in your cubicle, or in a Starbucks, or on the toilet.  Wherever you are, please pat your head with both hands at the same time. Repeat as many times as you like.  See picture below for details...

Bluebirds manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer can do they Ayatollah and so can you!  (Image Credit:  The Guardian)

Congratulations, you're now doing the Ayatollah!  Ignore the strange looks from your co-workers, they're just jealous that they picked soulless Manchester United as their Premier League club.    

I like the Ayatollah gesture becasue it jives well with my "problems with authority" nature.  In modern Cardiff City usage, it's done mostly in celebration of goal scoring.  But its roots stem from Welsh punk rock band U Thant and their crossover fans doing the motion as a taunt to riot police.  You can read more about its history in this 2009 Cardiff City Mad article.

Lest Alice from Finance feels left out, you can encourage her to participate as follows:

1. Shout, "Hey Al-ice!  Do the Ayatollah!"
2. Repeat step 1 above until Alice does the Ayatollah.

Aside from celebrating goals, that's really the only other appropriate use of the Ayatollah.  Cardiff City fans will shout the chant at a player or the manager-du-jour (sorry OGS, I still am dealing with Malky's departure) until they cave and do the Ayatollah.

Ok, now that you're up to speed let's get back to this week's match.

The Bluebirds were pinned back in their own half until the inevitable first MCI goal came 14 minutes into the match...

Manchester City's Edin Dzeko threads a shot between the Cardiff City defense (Image Credit:  Reuters)

Usually when down 1-0, Cardiff City collapse in on themselves.  It's not that they're incapable of scoring goals, it's just that they seem to lose all confidence in themselves.  But as I mentioned earlier, the Bluebirds are a different team when facing daunting opposition.

In Cardiff City's first 15 matches, Craig Noone (dammit Apple stop autocorrecting me with "No one") played about 90 minutes in total.  This was due to a combination of injury, fitness, and questions about Premier League readiness.  But starting in week 16, Noone has played almost every minute of every match and has been a source of energy on the team.

And during this match he scored his first Premier League goal...

How do you like me now!?  (Image Credit:  WalesOnline)

The score was 1-1 and the cheers from the away fan section were deafening.

The joy only lasted about five minutes though, because Manchester City pulled ahead again with a goal from Jesus Navas.

Cardiff City did well to keep the score at just 2-1 through the 75th minute of the match.  But then Manchester City players Yaya Toure and Sergio Aguero added to their club's lead.

Bluebird Fraizer Campbell had a last minute goal to bring the score to 4-2, but it felt mostly like a concession on Manchester City's part.

Overall, Cardiff City did put up a good fight.  They were aggressive and didn't let Manchester City run away with the game as they did against Tottenham (6-0) or Norwich City (7-0).

This was an unfortunate, but not unexpected, result.  OGS, you sir have your work cut out for you.

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer after realizing what a hot mess he inherited (Image Credit:  WalesOnline)

With this loss, the Bluebirds are in 20th place with 4 wins, 6 draws, and 12 losses.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 01/22/14.  The table columns are:  Current Position (POS), Last Position (LP), Club Name (CLUB), Matches Played (P), Wins (W), Draws (D), Losses (L), Goals Fielded (GF), Goals Allowed (GA), Goal Differential (GD), and Rankings Points (PTS).

In the post-match press conference, OGS said, "I knew what I was up against when I came to Cardiff."

"I did not come here and think everything was going to be all singing and dancing. It's going to be a tough league. But there's only five points up to number ten. It's still tight. We have to make sure we keep performing."

It's become seven points up to number ten since that press conference, but OGS's point is still valid.  It's easy to feel like crap when you see yourself in 20th place out of 20 clubs, but let's look at things from a different perspective:  

• 24 points:  Aston Villa
• 23 points:  Hull City and Norwich City
• 22 points:  West Bromwich Albion and Stoke City
• 21 points:  Swansea City
• 20 points:  Crystal Palace
• 19 points:  Fulham
• 18 points:  West Ham United, Sunderland, and Cardiff City

When laid out by points instead of rank, you can see how close the race for survival is in the Premier League.  With as little as a draw next week, the Bluebirds could lift themselves out of the relegation zone.  They will of course need some help (i.e. poor performances) from those around them, but the point is that this season is far from over and survival is still achievable.

Hopefully, my goal of making it to the top 1,000,000 in Fantasy Premier League is also still achievable.  

• Rank (Last Week):  1,324,294
• Rank (This Week):  1,337,819
• Total Players:  3,153,122

Despite playing a wildcard, the Cardiff'rent Strokes still managed to slip a bit further down in the rankings.  This was due largely to Southampton and Hull City blowing their matches against Sunderland and Norwich City respectively.  

Sigh.

There will be no post next week.  We'll be back on February 4th to cover the Bluebirds' next two matches:  January 28th away at Manchester United and February 1st at home against Norwich City.

Thank you as always for reading.  You can follow me on Twitter @dragon_bluebird.  And feel free to leave some comments on my posts via Blogger or Twitter.  Would love to hear your thoughts on the season so far and I'm always open to suggestions for features or topics you'd like to see on this blog.

Cardiff City vs. West Ham United: Stand Your Ground

Being the dedicated researcher that I am, I always keep my eyes open for relevant pop culture tidbits to round out my Premier League education.  I was fortunate enough to uncover a gem of a movie as part of my prep for this week's rematch between Cardiff City and West Ham United.  Green Street Hooligans.  

Pete Dunham:  "F$&k it, I will take you with me.  You might learn something..."

Matt Buckner:  "About soccer?"

Pete Dunham:  "No mate.  Not about soccer, AND FOR F$&K'S SAKE, STOP SAYING SOCCER!"

Pete (Charlie Hunnam of Sons of Anarchy) is an Englishman who has been forced to babysit his American brother-in-law by marriage Matt (Elijah Wood of Lord of the Rings) for a day.  Matt is a Journalism major and all-around wuss who has just been thrown out of Harvard because he volunteered to take the fall for his rich roommate's recently-discovered stash of cocaine.  It's never made clear why Matt agreed to do this, but I think you're supposed to just accept that it's something that Elijah Wood is likely to have done.

As any good babysitter would, Pete takes Matt to get wasted at a pub.  Delightfully, Pete tells his goon friends that Matt is tougher than he looks and was the inspiration for The Karate Kid.  

After the pub, Pete takes Matt to a West Ham United home match.  The club's performance is irrelevant to Pete and yet as the movie progresses we come to understand that the club as a concept is his entire reason for being.

Following the match, Pete and his friends have scheduled a fight with supporters of the opposing club.  Matt sanely declines an invitation to join them.  But despite his objections, Matt is dragged into the world of hooliganism.  His fighting style turns out to be less Karate Kid and more Bart Simpson in the classic episode "Lisa on Ice".

If you get hit, it's your own fault.

I'll come back to Green Street Hooligans in a few minutes, because limp-wristed (ankled?) assaults are as good a segue into this past week's match as any...

Cardiff City 0 - West Ham United 2

• Cole (WHU) 42'
• Noble (WHU) 90'

There are three reasons why this loss was a particularly bitter pill to swallow:

1. The Hammers are terrible.  They had lost their previous three matches by a combined 13-1.
2. The Bluebirds were not only favored to win this match, but they were also billed as almost three times more likely to win than to lose according to Premier League betting sites.
3. The Bluebirds are under new management and for the past few days an unusual sense of optimism and positivity had descended upon the fanbase.

It will of course take time for new manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer (OGS) to put his stamp on Cardiff City, but just the same I had expected this match to be a blowout in our favor.

No such luck.

The visitors were unexpectedly aggressive coming out of the gate.  Hammer James Tomkins almost gave them a 1-0 lead just three minutes into the match.  All credit goes to David Marshall for another miraculous save.

Then about thirty minutes into the match, Cardiff City's Kim Bo-Kyung gave us a reason to believe...

 The yellow blob on the net is the WHU goalkeeper's water bottle.  The ball is the faint image on the goal line.  

I wish we had the wherewithal on Dragon and Bluebird to bring you a GIF of this shot so that you could truly appreciate the divine injustice.  But in essence what happened was Kim's shot hit the upper bar of the goal and came straight down onto the goal line.

A mild breeze would have put the Bluebirds up 1-0.

I think that this miss burned off any optimism I had built up coming into the match.  

Goal opportunities are few and far between for Cardiff City and I've reached the point where I truly assume that every time the opposing team touches the ball, Cardiff City are in imminent danger of losing.

Does that make me a fair-weather or battle-hardened Bluebird fan?

I take notes on my phone during matches and this is what I wrote following Kim's non-goal:

"36 minutes part of me thinks I should shut this off now.  Then again Cardiff have waited until last ten minutes to blow the game lately, so this is likely the good part."

Which naturally lead to West Ham United's Carlton Cole scoring a few moments later and putting the Hammers up 1-0.

 Hammer Carlton Cole didn't bother watching the result of his attempt (Image Credit:  Getty Images)

Cardiff City were the better club in the second half.  And believe it or not the statistics will tell you that the Bluebirds were actually the better club for the entire match.  The following are the match stats (Cardiff first, then West Ham United):

• Time of Possession:  63%-27%
• Shots:  19-10
• On Target:  7-3
• Corners:  8-7
• Fouls:  7-16
• Yellow Cards:  1-4
• Red Cards:  0-1

Alas, Cardiff City were not the better club in the only stat that ever matters...Goals Scored.

West Ham United's defense was able to maintain the lead, even when down a man.  Hammer Mark Noble's goal in the match's final minutes was insult piled upon injury.

In Green Street Hooligans, Matt embraces the hooligan ethos.  I won't spoil the movie for you, but there comes a moment when he is faced with a decision to leave England and let down his new comrades or to stay and risk his life in a fight against Millwall supporters.

Intending to convince him that it's ok to not get his face bashed in, Matt's sister tells him, "You know that back home no one is going to care about your rep here, right?"

Matt takes this to mean, "I think you're a wuss, go back home and embrace your mediocrity".  Instead of running away, he joins up with his friends and stands his ground.

I think there's a lesson to be learned from Green Street Hooligans, by Cardiff City and at least this supporter.  

No, I'm not advocating tossing firebombs into the pubs of opposing team's fans.

If you'll pardon the analogy, "home" for the Bluebirds recent history at least has been the Football League Championship (i.e. tier 2 of English football).  If Cardiff City don't man up and start playing up to their potential, they will be going home.  And no one there will care that they made a fair go of it in the Premier League.

It's time for Cardiff City to stand their ground and fight back.  And it's time for me to stop sulking about these losses.  Not even my dog wants to hear it anymore.

The Bluebirds are in 18th place with 4 wins, 6 draws, and 11 losses.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 01/14/14.  The table columns are:  Current Position (POS), Last Position (LP), Club Name (CLUB), Matches Played (P), Wins (W), Draws (D), Losses (L), Goals Fielded (GF), Goals Allowed (GA), Goal Differential (GD), and Rankings Points (PTS).

You read that correctly.  Cardiff City are now in the relegation zone.  But the Bluebirds still have plenty of time to turn things around.  OGS will be a positive influence on their play style, new players have been added to the roster (more on this next week), and favorable matches are coming in February.

Oh and Jordon Mutch, whose jersey is hopefully making its way across the Atlantic as I write this post, will hopefully be back from injury soon.

I haven't dinged OGS for his managerial performance in part because it's his first week on the job and in part because I'm experiencing my own failures as a leader.  The Cardiff'rent Strokes took another dive this past week.

• Rank (Last Week):  1,271,016
• Rank (This Week):  1,324,294
• Total Players:  3,144,478

The time has come for me to utilize one of my two "wildcards" (i.e. unlimited team hiring/firing for one week).  So far I've booted out 11 members of my 15 man team.  Let's hope this shakeup leads to some success!

The Bluebirds' next match is on January 18th away at Manchester City.  Cardiff City began the season with a 0-2 loss to West Ham United and immediately followed with a shocking 3-2 win against Manchester City.  Having just lost to the Hammers again 2-0, will history repeat itself next week against the Citizens?

Tune in to Dragon and Bluebird next week to find out!

Thank you as always for reading.  You can follow me on Twitter @dragon_bluebird.  And feel free to leave some comments on my posts via Blogger.  Would love to hear your thoughts on the season so far and I'm always open to suggestions for any features or topics you'd like to see on this blog.  See you next week!