West Ham United vs. Cardiff City: Hammered

A few years ago, my wife and I started running 5k races.  For the most part, they're community fun runs where you see a complete mixed bag of "athletes" and no one takes the race too seriously.  Last year, we went to Cape Cod and competed in our first triathlon.  I remember commenting to my wife, as we set up our bike station, "Um...everyone here looks like they're in really good shape."  I also remember thinking I probably should have painted some abs and pecs onto my wet suit.

A little while later, as we stood waiting at the edge of the water, I had the same two thoughts that every first time triathlete has...A) this was a horrible idea and B) I probably should have trained harder.  The horn went off and for the next ninety minutes I pushed my body harder than ever before in my life.  It was ugly, pretty much everyone passed me, I didn't win anything, but dammit I finished.  

My first triathlon experience was pretty similar to that of Cardiff City this past Saturday in their Premier League debut.  Ninety minutes of wheezing, sweating, and wondering what the hell you're doing here as eleven other guys who have CLEARLY done this before run circles around you.

West Ham United 2 - Cardiff City 0

• Cole (WHU) 13'
• Nolan (WHU) 76'

Yes, the Hammers shut out the Bluebirds.  But it's not all bad news.  Cardiff City was the underdog in this match and they walked away without getting beaten too badly (more in a moment on why that's relevant).  They also got a much needed wake-up call as to the level of competition they'll be facing every single week in the Premier League.  The press described the Bluebirds performance this weekend as "tepid" and "uninspired".  Why don't we stay postive and call the experience "educational".

Much like Cardiff City, Saturday was also my first Premier League experience.  I won't call it exciting, but it was definitely interesting.  The best part by far was Joe Cole's insane 180 degree "I don't even need to be facing the net" goal.  I mean seriously, it was like watching Shaolin Soccer.

(Image Credit:  London Evening Standard)

And in contrast, the absolute worst part of the match was watching Kevin Nolan's goal celebration.  I've seen some awful taunts in my day, most of which involved indecent exposure or emulation of lewd sex acts.  But doing the Funky Chicken...that's just too much.

Kevin Nolan in the 2012/13 season (Image Credit:  www.itv.com)

A few more observations from my first Premier League match:

• Watching a non-DVR'd, commercial-free sporting event for 90+ minutes was very pleasant.
• The fans shout chants or sing through the entire match.  It kind of fades into the background the longer you watch, but it was noticeably different from the song clips played at American sporting events.
• Free kicks were oddly enjoyable and I found myself wishing there were more.

Overall, a decent first experience.  My wife watched parts of the match with me and I asked her what she thought.  She said, "It's a little boring."  I don't disagree.  I was left with the general feeling that I just watched twenty two guys hauling ass up and down the pitch, in near constant motion, but not much actually happened.  Here's hoping that the more I watch the more I'll appreciate the frantic inactivity.

The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 08/20/13.  The table columns are:  Club Name, Matches Played (Pld), and Match Points (Pts).

I mentioned earlier that one positive of Saturday's match was that Cardiff City didn't get beat too badly.  As you can see the teams on the "relegation watch" list are Hull City, Swansea City, and Newcastle United.  In the interest of full disclosure, Cardiff City and Hull City are technically tied for 17th place, both having a Goal Diffferential (GD) of -2.  Swansea City have a GD of -3 and Newcastle United got pummeled by Manchester City resulting in a GD of -4.  

Speaking of Manchester City, they will be Cardiff City's opponents in the home opener at Cardiff City Stadium this week on 08/25.

You can catch the match in one of two ways:

• Delayed broadcast on Comcast On-Demand.  Go to On-Demand > Sports and Fitness > Premier League > Match Replays.  You'll see the match listed (Might be an hour delayed from actual match start time).
• Stream the match live on iPhone or iPad by downloading the NBC Sports Live Extra app from iTunes (it's free, but you'll need to know your cable provider-provided Username and Password).

Next week I'm going to breakdown the hot mess that is my fantasy team.  Special thanks to Professor Kevin Fitzpatrick (scholar and gentleman) for putting me through a clinic after I came in dead last this past week in our Fantasy Premier League.

Thank you as always for reading Dragon and Bluebird!  You can find me on Twitter as well, @dragon_bluebird.