Cardiff City vs. Southampton/Sunderland: Hovering over the Sarlacc Pit

Cardiff City's debut Premier League season has reached the halfway point.  How can I summarize where they stand?  When stuck for inspiration in any aspect of my life, I always turn to science fiction.  And thus I think the best way to open this post and to illustrate the Bluebirds' current situation would be this...

You have cut me deep, George Lucas.  But I just can't quit you.

Like everything else in my life, it always comes back to Star Wars

The bad news is that Cardiff City are less than one win above the relegation zone.  The good news is that Luke gave R2 his lightsaber prior to lettting himself get captured AND Lando is secretly disguised as one of the skiff guards.

Hmm.  It seems that my analogy has gone awry.  Let's try that again.

Luke is taken out into the middle of the desert and is now standing a few feet above a disgusting, tooth-lined orifice (i.e. Cardiff City is two points above the relegation zone).  He is letting some chump, who ultimately is going to end up digested by aforementioned orifice, push him around (i.e. Sunderland and this week's inexplicable tie against them).  Jabba, shrewd businessman or nefarious crime syndicate leader depending on your perspective, tells C3PO to relay the message that he hopes the victims die honorably (i.e. Vincent Tan had one of his minions fire Malky Mackay this week).  Han and Chewie (i.e. The Cardiff City fans) tell Jabba to go screw...

Cardiff City fans protest owner Vincent Tan prior to Southampton match (Image Credit:  Action Images)

Ok, let's give the analogy horse a rest before we beat it to death.  Immediately following the above fan protest, the Bluebirds faced off against the Saints.  

Cardiff City 0 - Southampton 3

• Rodriguez (SOU) 14'
• Rodriguez (SOU) 20'
• Lambert (SOU) 27'

There is absolutely nothing positive to say about this match.  Southampton are good, but they aren't THAT good.  And don't even start with the "well I'm sure the Bluebirds were distracted by off-field issues".  You know what should help them focus?  Multi-million dollar contracts.  Just because my boss is fighting with his boss that does not mean I get to stink at MY job.

One of Southampton's Jay Rodriguez's two goals against Cardiff City (Image Credit:  Getty Images)

Rickie Lambert's shot sails past David Marshall (Image Credit:  Getty Images)

I mean, come on!  It took Liverpool 45 minutes to get 3 goals against Cardiff City and they have arguably the best soccer player on Earth on their team.  There are no excuses for letting Southampton have 3 goals in 27 minutes.  

If you glanced over at the sidelines during this match, you would have seen Malky Mackay in some variation of this pose...

What is wrong with you guys?!  (Image Credit:  Getty Images)

In last week's post I said, "There have been no public meetings between Tan and Mackay, but the understanding is that he will remain in charge for the foreseeable future."  Well "the foreseeable future" was less than a week.  Within 24 hours of Cardiff City's loss to Southampton, Mackay was given the boot.

I'm not going to dwell on his firing.  Yes he was a likable man.  Yes he was a successful Championship-level manager.  But the reality of the Premier League is that a 4-5-9 record (W-D-L at time of his firing) just isn't good enough to let you keep your job.  

I don't think Mackay should feel one bit ashamed about being fired.  He accomplished the impossible in leading Cardiff City to promotion.  And five other managers had already been sacked during this season prior to his firing.  

As an NFL fan, it's hard for me to comprehend just how common firing a coach during the season is for the Premier League.  Here are a few stats on in-season Premier League managerial sacking:

• 2010/11:  5 firings
• 2011/12:  4 firings
• 2012/13:  6 firings
• 2013/14:  6 firings (midway through season)

With Mackay fired, the job of caretaker was left to Cardiff City Assistant Manager David Kerslake.  How did he and the Bluebirds fare against the Black Cats of Sunderland?

Cardiff City 2 - Sunderland 2

• Mutch (CAR) 6'
• Campbell (CAR) 58'
• Fletcher (SUN) 83'
• Colback (SUN) 90'

Meow-ch.

This match was completely different than the previous against Southampton.  And yet the level of disappointment was the same.  Just so we're clear, Sunderland were and still are the absolute worst team in the Premier League.  This match was supposed to be one of the very few cakewalks for Cardiff City all season.  Was supposed to be...

Things started out well enough.  My man Jordon Mutch lit up Sunderland just 6 minutes into the match.

Pew!  Pew!  Pew!  (Image owner unlisted)

Cardiff City owned the field for the rest of the half and I never really felt like Sunderland was a threat.

Second began with a slightly more aggressive Sunderland side, but then Bluebird Fraizer Campbell added a goal of his own.  

Campbell has moves straight out of The Matrix (Image owner unlisted)

Ok, Cardiff City is up 2-0 and about 82nd minutes have elapsed.  This is cleary going to be a Bluebirds victory, right?  Well that's what I thought from my couch and I'm sure that's what Jody Davies (@jodylaforge) thought from his vantage point at the match...

What could possibly go wrong?

Then Cardiff City imploded.

Sunderland's Steven Fletcher scored in the 83rd minute.  And against all odds, with 10 seconds left in the match, Sunderland's Jack Colback scored his first goal of the season.  

Ron Weasley stuns the Bluebirds (Image owner unlisted)

And thus, the Bluebirds snatched defeat (yes a tie to the worst team in the league is a defeat) from the jaws of victory.

The Bluebirds are now in 16th place with 4 wins, 6 draws, and 9 losses.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 12/31/13.  The table columns are:  Current Position (POS), Last Position (LP), Club Name (CLUB), Matches Played (P), Wins (W), Draws (D), Losses (L), Goals Fielded (GF), Goals Allowed (GA), Goal Differential (GD), and Rankings Points (PTS).

We're 19 matches into the 38-match season and it's time again to examine what these results mean in the larger context.  The average number of points needed to avoid relegation, over the previous 21 seasons, is 37.  Clubs have survived with as few as 31 points and in some seasons have needed as many as 43 points.  After 19 matches, Cardiff City have earned 18 points.  Projecting to the end of the season at this same level of successs, this would put the Bluebirds at 36 points.  That's just one point shy of the historical average number of points needed to avoid relegation.

Let's go back to my Return of the Jedi analogy.  Luke is on the precipice of the Sarlacc pit.  He is surrounded by bad guys that would love to see him digested.  But you know how this ends.  With a little help from those around him, he turns the tables on Jabba and goes on to keep fighting for the Rebel Alliance.

Enough nerdery, here's what I'm trying to say.  Cardiff City are in 16th and with just one win they could be as high as 12th.  They've done well enough in the first half of the season to build the foundation needed to survive.  In my opinion, Stoke City, Norwich City, West Bromwich Albion, Crystal Palace, Fulham, West Ham United, and Sunderland are all worse teams than Cardiff City.  

Jabba...I mean Tan is in the process of hiring a new manager and he plans to give that guy almost as much funding in January as Mackay had in the Summer to recruit new players.  So that should help.  

In short, I'm legitimately pleased with where the Bluebids sit in the table.  And at the end of the season I believe they'll be safe from relegation.  We'll take another look at the standings after 29 games.  Then after game 30, I'll begin breaking down the exact scenarios necessary for the Bluebirds to stay up.

On to fantasy news.  The Cardiff'rent Strokes now sit at their highest rank of the entire season!

• Rank (Last Week):  1,358,010
• Rank (This Week):  1,249,029
• Total Players:  3,126,484

We hit a low point mid-week when we imploded against our one and only Fantasy Cup opponent.  But thanks in part to Sunderland's Jack Colback (and to-date worst performer on my fantasy team) we bounced back and are sitting pretty for the moment.

Now that I've been eliminated from Cup contention, my new goal is to crack into the top 1,000,000 players.  Stay tuned!

That's it for this week readers.  Cardiff City's next match is on January 1st away against Arsenal.  Thank you for reading and don't forget to follow me on Twitter @dragon_bluebird!

Liverpool vs. Cardiff City: E Malkymus Unum

In last week's Dragon and Bluebird post, I somewhat casually mentioned that "...Mackay's odds [of getting fired] are more likely [than other current managers] because of backroom tension with Cardiff City ownership with which I've elected not to weigh down this blog."  Well unfortunately, that tension has boiled over and I can't fairly report on my first season watching the Premier League without sharing the situation with you.

Hold your noses, dear readers, because something is truly rotten in the state of Denmark...er...Wales.

This is Cardiff City majority shareholder Vincent Tan...

Don't mess around with the guy in shades (Image Credit:  WalesOnline)

Below are two scenes of Cardiff City fans taken at this week's match...

With the lights out, it's less dangerous...

...Here we are now, entertain us

How did we get to this point?  Here's what you need to know...

1.  Cardiff City stank for decades

2.  Tan bought a majority stake in the club in 2010 and proceeded to dump millions of pounds into it

3.  Cardiff City no longer stank

4.  Tan changed the jersey color and badge of one hundred years to cater to his desired Asian fanbase

5.  Cardiff City fans went ballistic

6.  Cardiff City won the Championship League (i.e. 2nd tier of English soccer) and got promoted to the Premier League (i.e. 1st tier of English soccer) for the first time in almost 60 years

7.  Cardiff City fans still pissed about changes, but distracted by the promotion excitement

8.  Tan builds new training facilities, negotiates a long-standing debt settlement, and authorizes $35M to buy new players in the summer

Below is a list of Cardiff City's summer signings and their base transfer fees.  I put ranges for most of these numbers because different sites report different exact values.

Gary Medel:  $11M-$13M

Steven Caulker:  $8M-$9.15M

Andreas Cornelius:  $7.5M-$8.7M

Peter Odemwingie:  $2.25M-$2.9M

Kevin Theophile-Catherine:  $2.1M-$2.5M

John Brayford:  $1.5M-$1.74M

Simon Moore:  Undisclosed (estimated at $0.175M)

Maximiliano Amondarain:  Free

Total Base Transfer Fees:  $32.55M-$38.17M

OK, so Tan authorized $35M and the club spent $35M +/- $3M depending on who you believe.  So what's the issue?  Well, the base transfer fees are only part of the equation.  That money goes to the club from which you're getting the new player.  There are "add-ons" and "other fees" that go along with each player transfer.  According to most sources, these added costs came to $15M for the eight new players, bringing the grand total spent over the summer to approximately $50M.

I don't mean to bore you with these numbers, but that $15M over Tan's publicly-stated, authorized amount of $35M is the cited reason for firing Cardiff City's head of recruitment Iain Moody in October.  

Moody has since stated that he had full approval from ownership for every signing and has yet to hear a legitimate explanation for his firing.  Oh by the way, Tan replaced Moody with a 23 year old intern who had spent the summer painting the stadium.  

Yes, seriously.

Fast forward to earlier this week when Bluebirds' manager Malky Mackay told reporters that he had a wishlist of new players to add to the team and that he planned to ask for approval from the owners.  Tan promptly sent an email to Mackay demanding that he resign or be fired.

Tan felt that Mackay had overstepped in mentioning to the press that new player acquisitions were even a possibility.  Among the other reasons cited, Tan reiterated his unhappiness with the overspending, with Cardiff City's playstyle, and with the club's performance to date.

Whoa whoa whoa.  The Bluebirds are in 15th place in their debut Premier League season.  Why are we even discussing FIRING the man who got them there?

That my friends is a point of confusion that absolutely no one other than Vincent Tan can clear up.

I've given you the facts.  Everything else you read about the situation is conjecture.  But conjecture is more than enough to try one in the court of public opinion, and Tan has been found guilty.  Premier League managers and owners, fans of other clubs, and the press of several nations have been united in slamming Tan's actions.

For those of you who may not have watched a Premier League match, the first thing you'll see in the televised program are live shots of the players lined up in a tunnel to the field.  And if you had been watching this particular week, the first think you would have heard were Gladiator-esque chants of "Malky Mackay" from the crowd outside.  This is particularly impressive considering there were only about 3,000 traveling Cardiff City fans and roughly 40,000 home fans present.

In addition to the very audible chanting, two other things surprised me.  First was the fact that Malky was even the manager for this match.  He had delegated the traditional pre-match press conference and the media were confident in reporting that he was likely to be stripped of his duties prior to the match.  

The second thing that surprised me was that the Bluebirds were dressed in their BLUE away jerseys that rarely get used.  

So we have gone from a very public "resign or be fired" email to a stadium screaming Malky's name, in a game at which he wasn't even expected to manage, leading a team dressed in Tan's least favorite color.

What the heck?!

That brings us right up to the start of Cardiff City's match against the Reds of Liverpool...

Liverpool 3 - Cardiff City 1

• Suarez (LIV) 25'
• Sterling (LIV) 42'
• Suarez (LIV) 45'
• Mutch (CAR) 58'

The Bluebirds kicked off this match fiercely.  Well, fiercely defensive at least.

This match was another "Miracle if they manage to draw" situation.  I don't like thinking that way, but the sport is what it is and I'm in deep enough that I do find myself pleased when Cardiff City walk away with one point.

At this time, I should probably acknowledge the Uruguayan elephant in the room.  His name is Luis Suarez and he scores goals.  Lots of goals.

ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!  (Image Credit:  Getty Images)

I don't think you understand how many goals this man scores.  After lighting up Cardiff City this past week, Suarez has scored a total of 19 goals.  There are eleven TEAMS with less than 19 goals!

Suarez's (what is the possessive form of "Suarez"?) first opportunity came less than two minutes into the match.  Then fourteen minutes in, Cardiff City's Craig Noone had their only legitimate shot of the first half.  No luck.

The Bluebirds' defense was up to the challenge and survived constant pressure from the Reds.  That is until Suarez's first goal at 25 minutes.  The commentator mentioned that a goal from Suarez was "inevitable".

After that goal, Cardiff City looked punch drunk.  Suarez followed his first goal with an assist to teammate Raheem Sterling 42 minutes in, and then added another goal of his own at 45 minutes.

The first half ended with the Bluebirds outshot 16-3 and out possessed 75%-25%.

At halftime it was awkward to hear commentators discussing Malky's replacement candidates and speculating that he'll surely be fired at the end of the match.  

In the second half, Cardiff's City's defensive form improved.  Or maybe Liverpool just didn't bother trying anymore since they were up 3-0.  It's hard as a novice soccer viewer to tell the difference.  

A spectacular, although ultimately meaningless, Bluebirds goal did finally arrive at 58 minutes into the match.  And that goal came form none other than rising star Jordon Mutch.  

On my signal, unleash hell.  (Image Credit:  WalesOnline)

Done deal bud, I'm buying your jersey.  Just need to settle some personal qualms over what color...

It was sad to see the cameras cut to the sideline to show Malky's reaction to the goal.  Normally he's animated and fist pumps, but this day he just looked distracted.

The match ended 3-1 with the Cardiff City fans screaming Malky's name.  They hadn't stopped since that moment in the tunnel.  

Malky Mackay is a class act.  He really believed this was his last time on the field as the Bluebirds' manager.  As soon as the match ended, he went over to the away section and applauded the fans...

More class than a university.  (Image Credit:  Getty Images)

The only word I can find to describe the scene is "adulation".  

Mackay left the field and I'm told that the away fans sang "Don't Sack Malky" 225 consecutive times AFTER the match, before the Liverpool stadium attendants and police finally managed to get them to leave.

I cannot say whether it was the massive outpouring of public support, the actions of a few trusted advisors, or a change of heart, but somehow as of the time I'm writing Mackay is still Cardiff City's manager.  There have been no public meetings between Tan and Mackay, but the understanding is that he will remain in charge for the foreseeable future.  

The drama isn't over, and the season continues.

The Bluebirds remain in 15th place with 4 wins, 5 draws, and 8 losses.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 12/25/13.  The table columns are:  Current Position (POS), Last Position (LP), Club Name (CLUB), Matches Played (P), Wins (W), Draws (D), Losses (L), Goals Fielded (GF), Goals Allowed (GA), Goal Differential (GD), and Rankings Points (PTS).

In fantasy news, the Cardiff'rent Strokes had a very slight dip in the standings, but overall I'm very pleased with their performance to date...

• Rank (Last Week):  1,351,143
• Rank (This Week):  1,358,010
• Total Players:  3,113,472

Next week the Fantasy Cup tournament begins.  The top 2,097,152 ranked players, of which I am one, qualify for the tournament.  Each week, random pairings of the qualified players are made.  Whoever has the most points in that week wins and moves on, the loser is eliminated.  Very excited to see how this plays out and I'll keep you posted as the tournament progresses.

That's it for this week readers.  Cardiff City have two games coming up in the next week.  First they will host Southampton on December 26th and then they host Sunderland on December 28th.  

I want to wish you and your families a Merry Christmas!  Thank you for reading and don't forget to follow me on Twitter @dragon_bluebird!

Cardiff City vs. West Bromwich Albion: Wrath of Khaaaaaaardiff

This past Saturday morning, after watching the second half of the Manchester City-Arsenal laser show, my television offered me a dilemma....

TV:  Mark, do you really want to watch the Cardiff City match today?

Mark:  Yes.

TV:  Are you sure?

Mark:  I was until you said it that way...

TV:  What if I were to tell you that Wrath of Khan is on at the same time?

Mark:  Oh man, I love me some Wrath of Khan.  But I have to watch the match!

TV:  Do you?

Mark:  Um...

TV:  You know they haven't scored a goal since four matches ago.

Mark:  Er...

TV:  And their last win was six matches ago.

Mark:  Ugh.

TV:  <Maniacal laugh>

While I did wrestle with the decision, come 10am the Bluebirds were playing on my iPad.

They did not disappoint.

Cardiff City 1 - West Bromwich Albion 0

• Whittingham (CAR) 65'

Ah...not so wounded as we were led to believe.  So much the better!

This was not a beautiful match.  What took place on Saturday was two teams throwing whatever they had at each other in a desperate bid to move away from the relegation zone.  

There were no shining moments in the first half, but I did think that Cardiff City played more attacking soccer than I had seen in previous matches.  They had a siginificant lead in terms of possession time at the end of the half.  And unlike most of the previous fifteen matches, I never felt that they were in any serious danger from West Brom.

The second half opened with the score level at 0-0.  At some point during the break it started to rain and the commentators had this gem of a conversation...

Commentator 1:  Conditions are wretched all of a sudden.

Commentator 2:  Are you referring to the weather or the game?

Everyone is a comedian

I should mention at this point that friend of Dragon and Bluebird, Jody Davies (@jodylaforge), was once again in attendance at the match.  Thanks for the pics, bud!  And does this picture in fact confirm that Santa is a Cardiff City fan?

Santa!  I know him!

After three fourths of the match had gone by, still with a score of 0-0, I was starting to regret not watching Wrath of Khan for the 30th time.  And then Peter Whittingham restored my faith in the Bluebirds.

Rising up, straight to the top... (Image Credit:  Getty Images)

...had the guts, got the glory (Image Credit:  Alex Morton/Action Images)

And with that brain-jarring header, Cardiff City went up over West Brom.  

Peter Whittingham looked like he banged his head pretty hard after that play.  I couldn't tell how badly he was hurt, but it definitely took him a while to get up.  

But get up he did and thanks to that goal and a few critical performances from Bluebirds' goalkeeper David Marshall, Cardiff City earned a much-needed win.  At the end of the match, the West Brom away fans broke out into a fight with each other and then ultimately the stadium attendants and the police.  That could just have easily been the Cardiff City fans had the results been reversed.

The Bluebirds now find themselves in 15th place with 4 wins, 5 draws, and 7 losses.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 12/17/13.  The table columns are:  Current Position (POS), Last Position (LP), Club Name (CLUB), Matches Played (P), Wins (W), Draws (D), Losses (L), Goals Fielded (GF), Goals Allowed (GA), Goal Differential (GD), and Rankings Points (PTS).

The Bluebirds have managed to put a paper-thin buffer between themselves and the relegation zone.  The Baggies (yes that really is West Brom's nickname) on the other hand are left feeling slightly less secure.

Let's stick with the West Brom storyline for another moment, as there were some ominous events that took place after the match.  A single win next week could put the Baggies as high as 13th in the league.  A loss and wins by two of the lower-ranked teams would put them in 18th.  

Apparently the owners of West Brom were not willing to wait a week to see how their manager, Steve Clarke, would fare.  He was fired a few hours after the loss to Cardiff City.

Mid-season firings happen in all sports.  In the NFL, maybe 2 or 3 coaches each year get fired before the season is finished.  But what absolutely blows my mind is that in the 2013/14 Premier League season to date, 5 managers have already been fired!

• Crystal Palace's Ian Holloway
• Fulham's Martin Jol
• Sunderland's Paolo di Canio
• Tottenham's Andre Villas-Boas
• West Brom's Steve Clarke

Mind you, the NFL has 32 teams and the Premier League only has 20.  So 25% of the Premier League managers that started this season have been axed!

If you take a look back up at the standings table, you can see that four of these managers were in charge of bottom five clubs.  As nuts as it sounds, when you're in a league that has relegation you literally cannot afford to lose matches.  

The fifth of the recenlty fired managers might seem like a more confusing case.  They currently sit in 7th place, and with a few wins could (mathematically at least) make it to 1st place before the end of the season.  So why fire the manager?  Well, 7th isn't good enough for some teams as there are financial incentives for finishing in 5th or better.  Tottenham are in a bit of a downward spiral in the past few matches and I'm sure the owners were starting to wonder if Villas-Boas was ever a good manager or if having the best player on the planet last season made him look better.

I bring this all up because the next two most obvious candidates for the axe would be West Ham's Sam Allardyce and Cardiff City's Malky Mackay.  The Vegas odds on "Next Manager to Leave" stand at 5/2 and 11/10 respectively.  If you're wondering, Mackay's odds are more likely because of backroom tension with Cardiff City ownership with which I've elected not to weigh down this blog.

Still it was a great week for the Bluebirds, and Mackay has released a statement today (Tuesday) reiterating his commitment to stay at Cardiff City to make sure they remain in the Premier League next season.

One manager who is unquestionably safe from firing is this guy (points at self).  My Cardiff'rent Strokes continue to show modest improvement thanks in part to Peter Whittingham!

• Rank (Last Week):  1,477,881
• Rank (This Week):  1,351,143
• Total Players:  3,100,820

Well that's it for this week.  Don't forget to check out Dodgem-X on iTunes and follow the band on Twitter (@DodgemXofficial).  And thank you as always for reading Dragon and Bluebird!  You can find me on Twitter as well, @dragon_bluebird.

Stoke City/Crystal Palace vs. Cardiff City: Don't Panic (Yet)

Sorry for the delay, readers.  I have to admit this week's post was a tough one to write.  I had hoped to tell you about a tidy two wins in four days, but alas no such luck.  So let us get the facts out of the way, dust ourselves off, and look forward to some better performances from the Bluebirds in their upcoming matches.

Stoke City 0 - Cardiff City 0

- If a soccer ball rolls in a forest and no one is around, does it make a sound?

This was the first match of the doubleheader week, and what can one really say about a zero zero tie?

I was actually in Tucson, AZ for work while this match was being played.  I finished dinner around 9pm and had every intention of watching the full replay on my iPad.  But when I accidentally saw that the match had ended 0-0 I let out a "NOPE" loud enough for the coyotes outside my hotel window to hear.

This is actually a pretty accurate depiction of Tucson

Stoke City are not a good club.  Like Cardiff City, they are residents of the Premier League's "just above relegation" neighborhood.  But in this meeting, neither the Potters nor the Bluebirds did anything to elevate themselves.  While Stoke City did have the edge in possession time, both teams had similar (i.e. crappy) goal attempt statistics.

From the match reports that I read, it seems like towards the end both sides got a bit chippy.  I think that's natural for two clubs that go into a match believing that their opponent should have been a pushover.

Stoke City striker Peter Crouch looks and sounds exactly like Chewbacca (Image Credit:  Getty Images)

Still, Cardiff City left the stadium with a point and that's good enough for government work.

Which unfortunately brings us to the Bluebirds' match against fellow promotees Crystal Palace...

Crystal Palace 2 - Cardiff City 0

• Jerome (CPL) 6'
• Chamakh (CPL) 57'

Is there any more gifted actor in all of science fiction history than Patrick Stewart?  No.

For my money, I prefer the above Picard Facepalm to the standard internet Picard Facepalm.  It artfully blends the emotions of despair, fatigue, and incredulous mirth all in one pose.  And I think that it nicely sums up the 90+ minutes of athletic excrement I witnessed on Saturday.

Crystal Palace were not good by any means, but Cardiff City were atrocious.  It was sort of like watching the kids scrimmage during halftime at a Celtics game.  Neither side are playing basketball per se, but your kids are on the team that are picking their noses and doing the worm on the court

If we dig deep for a positive from this debacle, I will say that each week I am more impressed with Jordon Mutch...

Life imitating FIFA 14 (Image Credit:  Huw Evans Picture Agency)

"Dammit" (Image Credit:  Huw Evans Agency)

Jordon if you're reading this, you are currently in the lead to become my first Premier League jersey!  I wear a size large and have absolutely no qualms about accepting bribes for future positive commentary on this blog.

Crystal Palace have spent the entire season alternating with Sunderland between 19th and 20th place.  I honestly can't explain why Crystal Palace had such a convincing win this weekend.  Maybe it is because their new manager of two weeks has lit a fire under their collective asses.  Whatever the reason, they earned this win.

I should also issue an apology to Crystal Palace.  I wrote you off very quickly during my quest for a Premier League team and I'm sorry.  I like that you fly an eagle across the field before your matches and your fans are top notch.  I do however stand by my statement that your name sounds like a strip club.  Albeit, a very classy strip club, but a strip club nonetheless.

Don't send me hate mail, Dragon and Bluebirds readers, I'm still with Cardiff City for life.  Just giving credit where credit is due.

Following this week of disappointment, the Bluebirds now find themselves in 16th place with 3 wins, 5 draws, and 7 losses.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 12/11/13.  The table columns are:  Club Name, Matches Played (Pld), and Rankings Points (Pts).

This post has been a bit gloomy so far, so let's shine a positive light on the Bluebirds' current situation.  

First, Cardiff City are in 16th place.  In any other sport, 16th out of 20 teams would be garbage.  But in the Premier League, finishing anywhere between 6th and 17th is just fine.  We can talk some other time about why finishing 5th or better matters, but for this debut season the name of the game is solely to avoid relegation (18th place or worse).  Next season will bring more television revenue and thus more experienced players to replace the scrubs.

Second, the Bluebirds really aren't performing that poorly for a new Premier League club.  To date, they have accumulated 14 points in 15 matches.  If they continue at this pace, history says they will (probably) avoid relegation and live to fight again next season.  

Third, there are four matches left until the halfway mark of the season and I believe Cardiff City can walk away with 5 points from them.  Let's review some quick stats to show why I'm optimistic about these matches.

Cardiff City Home Record:  2 Wins 2 Draws 3 Losses, 7 Goals Fielded 10 Goals Allowed

Cardiff City Away Record:  1W 3D 4L, 4F 12A

Next four opponent stats...

• West Bromwich Albion at Cardiff City (WBA Away Record:  1W 4D 2L, 7F 10A)
• Liverpool at Liverpool (LIV Home Record:  7W 0D 1L, 22F 5A)
• Southampton at Cardiff City (SOU Away Record:  2W 2D 3L, 5F 8A)
• Sunderland at Cardiff City (SUN Away Record:  0W 2D 5L, 2F 14A)

From these matches, I'm predicting a draw, loss, draw, and win in that order.  Liverpool is going to crush Cardiff City, period.  And Sunderland can't beat an egg with a whisk.  The other two games are pretty even matches and I honestly think they will both end in 1-1 draws.

So lift your chins up, Bluebirds fans!  Yes Cardiff City should have beaten Crystal Palace.  But surprise performances against Manchester City and Manchester United have helped balance out a bad loss.  And the Bluebirds are still in good enough shape to stay up.

The Cardiff'rent Strokes are also in good enough shape.  We seem to have settled into a comfortable zone of marginally-better-than-average performance.  Here's the summary of my FPL status...

• Rank (This Week):  1,477,881
• Rank (Last Week):  1,477,728
• Total Players:  3,091,954

Interesting note, after 15 weeks, only one of the original Cardiff'rent Strokes' 15 members remains.  That would be Sunderland midfielder Jack Colback.  

Mark, why do you still have the third best player on the worst club in the Premier League on your fantasy team?  This has been an item for which I've been heckled by my friends in the Fantasy League. There's no good explanation, but believe me it's not that I'm being sentimental.  Basically, Colback is insanely cheap and I've had so many more expensive problems to fix this season that I just can't fire him.  In January I get the opportunity to rebuild my team from scratch for free, so rest assured he'll be gone by then.

Well that's it for this week, thank god.  Cardiff City's next match is at home against West Bromwich Albion on December 14th.  Stay positive, readers, and don't panic!

Thank you as always for reading Dragon and Bluebird!  You can find me on Twitter as well, @dragon_bluebird.

Cardiff City vs. Arsenal: Outgunned, but not Outclassed

...and I'm back.  Murph, thanks for covering for me while I was on vacation!

It's cold and rainy here in Massachusetts where I'm writing this week's post.  Normally this wouldn't bother me, but for the past seven days I was in the Caribbean enjoying my first cruise with my wife and in-laws.  As we speak, my bronzed roman god physique is reverting back to its naturally pasty state and I'm feeling a little bit sun-starved.

If you live in New England long enough (or Olde England as well I suppose), you start to forget what real sunlight feels like.  The closest we come to it is during the summer months when we escape to Maine or Cape Cod.  Which is great of course, but it's not quite the same as this...

View of Magens Bay from "Mountain Top" St. Thomas, US Virgin Islands

The above picture was taken out on the deck of "Mountain Top" St. Thomas, which is allegedly the home of the first Banana Daiquiri.  I have no way of verifying this claim (the internet says it was either invented in St. Thomas in the 1950s or in Cuba in the 1800s), but who cares about details when someone is handing you banana puree mixed with a triple shot of rum? 

Snorkeling off the coast of St. Martin was probably my favorite part of the trip.  We saw a sunken ship and a cannon, which admittedly led me to entertain the hope that I might find a chest full of gold doubloons somewhere on the ocean floor. 

Searching for pirate treasure off the coast of St. Martin to offset our bingo losses

Back on board the ship, I was ecstatic to find out that ESPN FC would be broadcasting the Cardiff City-Arsenal match.  The members of Bluebirds USA (i.e. aforementioned wife and in-laws) and I caught the entire game in one of the ship's bars.

Dedicated Bluebirds fans or just people waiting for "Napkin Artistry, Level 2" to begin?

I like the fact that watching a sporting event has the ability to bring complete strangers together.  An Aston Villa fan and a Bayern Munchen fan sat next to us watching a Bundesliga (i.e. the German equivalent of the Premier League) match.  I'm pretty sure those two guys didn't know each other when they came into the bar, but by the end of the match they were hugging and snapping photos of each other.

OK, I think I've kept you in suspense long enough.  Down to blog business.  Did Cardiffy City manage to pull off another miracle like last week?

Unfortunately not...the Gunners sank the HBMS Bluebird.

Cardiff City 0 - Arsenal 3

• Ramsey (ARS) 29'
• Flamini (ARS) 86'
• Ramsey (ARS) 90'

You'd be forgiven for thinking that anything is possible for the Bluebirds after they defeated Manchester City and drew against Manchester United.  But Arsenal is a different beast.  Coming into this match, they were the leaders in the Premier League standings.  And you could see why when you watched them play.

Less than two minutes into the match, Arsenal's Jack Wilshire launched a rocket that almost squashed Cardiff City's hopes before they could even get their footing.  Luckily, Wilshire's shot hit one of the goal bars and the game marched on.

A moment ago I said that the Gunners were a different beast, and I think it's fair to say so too were these Bluebirds from the ones that lost their season opener to West Ham United.  As fast as Arsenal were on the field, Cardiff City were able to keep pace with them for the majority of the match.  Just a few minutes after Wilshire's near-goal, Bluebird Fraizer Campbell had a solid attempt of his own.

Ten minutes into the match, Frazier Campbell barely misses the goal (Image Credit:  Cardiff City FC Official Website)

About thirty minutes into the match, Arsenal star Aaron Ramsey netted the ball and gave the Gunners a lead they would never relinquish.  I wasn't kidding though when I said Arsenal was up against a credible opponent.  Cardiff City's Kim, Mutch, Whittingham, Cowie, and Theophile-Catherine all had legitimate attempts during the match.  And they kept the score at 0-1 for most of the game...until Arsenal's Mathieu Flamini added to the tally.

Ramsey's second goal in stoppage time was just gravy on top of an already cooked bird.

After the game, I did a little research on Ramsey.  I knew he was Welsh, but I was surprised to learn that he actually came up through the Cardiff City academy system.  And he also started his professional career with the Bluebirds before joining Arsenal.  Remembering the debt he owes to Cardiff City and its fans, Ramsey showed a ton of class by not celebrating either of his two goals.  

Ramsey does the Cardiff City "Ayatollah" as a gesture of respect to the Bluebirds' fans  (Image Credit:  Cardiff City FC Official Website)

Speaking of classy Welshmen, Jody Davies (@jodylaforge) was once again in attendance at the Cardiff City Stadium and emailed me this game shot...

Somewhere down there, Gary Medel is resisting the urge to bite someone

Thanks, bud.  And if anyone from the Cardiff City establishment is reading, how about allowing Dodgem-X to perform a punk rendition of "Men of Harlech" for an upcoming home game?

At the end of the day, no matter how well they acquitted themselves, the Bluebirds still find themselves in 17th place with 3 wins, 4 draws, and 6 losses.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 12/03/13.  The table columns are:  Club Name, Matches Played (Pld), and Rankings Points (Pts).

Technically, Cardiff City are just one spot away from the relegation zone.  But things aren't quite as bad as they may seem.  The Bluebirds have two matches in the next five days and by this time next week, they could be sitting as high as 10th place.  So keep the faith!

Speaking of faith, I hope you haven't given up on the Cardiff'rent Strokes!  They've had a few good weeks and are now slightly better than mediocre.  This is due in no small part to Aaron Ramsey whose goals, while detrimental in reality, helped propel my fantasy team forward in their journey to greatness.  Here's the summary of my FPL status...

• Rank (This Week):  1,477,728
• Rank (Last Week):  1,582,387
• Total Players:  3,077,104

That's it for this week.  Cardiff City will face Stoke City away on December 4th and then Crystal Palace away on December 7th.  I have no idea why they have two games in one week, but it's the same story for all the other Premier League clubs as well.  Which means that next week will be a super-sized post from Dragon and Bluebird, so tell all your friends!

You should also tell all your friends that they can download the Dodgem-X EP "After the Horse has Bolted" for free at dodgem-x.moonfruit.com

I checked the album out.  It sounds similar to the screaming bits from Linkin Park mashed up with the Dropkick Murphys.  You can find more songs from Dodgem-X on iTunes and follow the band on Twitter (@DodgemXofficial).

Thank you as always for reading Dragon and Bluebird!  You can find me on Twitter as well, @dragon_bluebird.