Cardiff City vs. Tottenham Hotspur: Punk Rock and Shell Shock

I have a love/hate relationship with social media.  For every sublime masterpiece of a family pet wearing human clothing on Instagram, there are ten poorly-lit photos of some Olive Garden abomination.  For every perfectly-balanced moment of self deprecation on Facebook, there are at least three woefully ill-informed political tirades.

Considering that I have accounts on LinkedIn, Goodreads, and Google+ all in states of advanced decomposition, the last thing I needed was a Twitter account.  But, short of moving to Wales, Twitter was the best means to stay plugged in to the Cardiff City fan community...so tweet tweet tweet.

And you know what?  As overwhelming as Twitter can be, it has reminded me that it's the social more so than the media that makes these experiences worthwhile.  Case in point, this past weekend Jody (@jodylaforge) a South Wales resident and Dragon and Bluebird follower graciously offered to take some photos of the Cardiff City-Tottenham Hotspur match from his seat.  

Check out two of the pictures he sent below!

When he's not busy with pro bono foreign news correspondent roles, Jody is the frontman of alt/punk band Dodgem-X.  You can read Jody's Soundscape Magazine interview here.  

Be sure to check out Dodgem-X on iTunes and follow them on Twitter (@DodgemXofficial)!  Thanks again, Jody.  Gentleman and scholar.

Now back to the match...

Cardiff City 0 - Tottenham Hotspur 1

• Paulinho (TOT) 92'

A tough, final moment loss for the Bluebirds.  Cardiff City had great energy out of the gate, to the point of seeming frantic.  But it wasn't long before the Spurs took over and dominated every inch of the field.

Dominated?  How can I say anyone dominated in a 0-1 match?  Well by the end of the first half, Tottenham had taken 14 attempts on goal as opposed to Cardiff City's 1.  The game ended with 29-6 attempts in favor of the bad guys.  To be honest it felt like the Spurs made 100 attempts and the Bluebirds were just bunkered down in their third of the field.

There were still some positives from Cardiff City this weekend.  

Bluebirds goalkeeper David Marshall is absolutely amazing.  Picture Neo performing physics-defying kung fu in the Matrix and you'll have a good sense of this man's work.  If there is any player on Cardiff City who is unquestionably Premier League talent, it's David Marshall.

Also, this weekend we saw the debut of forward Peter Odemwingie.  He came on in the 65th minute and was nearly vibrating with excitement.  His shining moment was a legitimate goal setup for Aron Gunnarsson, which unfortunately sailed over the net.  Odemwingie seems promising, and at this point the Bluebirds offense needs all the help it can get.

Which brings me to my favorite moment of the match...the moment when Gary "el pitbull" Medel decided to take matters into his own hands.  Medel is a defensive midfielder.  But at one point in the match I think he just said "f this I'm going to go score some goals".  He then proceeded to kick a ridiculous 40 yard attempt on goal.  Much applause for the effort, very ballsy.

#garymedelfact:  Medel does not kick the ball, Medel demands that the field move itself (Image Credit:  Video screenshot from Cardiff City FC Official Website)

Check out Gary Medel's cameo on the official Cardiff City YouTube channel here.  Around the 5 minute mark he educates the reporter as to who holds the world's fastest tennis serve record.

Anyways, by the 91st minute of the match I was pretty convinced that through Marshall's heroics and an enormous amount of luck Cardiff City would walk away with a draw.  And then Spurs midfielder Paulinho scored a heartbreaking goal.

Rough day at the office (Image Credit:  Michael Steele/Getty Images Europe)

Following this result, the Bluebirds find themselves in 16th place with 1 win, 2 draws, and 2 losses.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 09/24/13.  The table columns are:  Club Name, Matches Played (Pld), and Ranking Points (Pts).

And in fantasy news, the Cardiff'rent Strokes faired no better than Cardiff City this week.  We've dropped a few spots unfortunately.  Here's the summary of my FPL status:  

• Rank (Last Week):  1,427,085
• Rank (This Week):  1,786,389
• Total Players:          2,942,900

Better luck next week!  Cardiff City's next Premier League match is away against Fulham on September 28th.

Thank you as always for reading Dragon and Bluebird!  You can find me on Twitter as well, @dragon_bluebird.

Hull City vs. Cardiff City: Eye (and Socks) of the Tiger

I think from day one of this project, I knew that learning to like the Premier League was going to be as much about absorbing my adopted club's culture as it was about watching their matches.  And what better way to learn about a Welsh club than to drink Welsh beers!  

Don't judge me.  For the record, I did first try to watch one episode of Gavin and Stacey...

Smithy:  "Oh, the guilt.  She stuck things in...oh...look can you ask Stacey coz' if it's a Welsh thing I don't have to see a doctor."  

I'm shelving that series until someone tells me that Nessa never again puts things up poor Smithy's bum.  Thus began my quest to find Welsh beers in Massachusetts.  

My brother-in-law gave me an assist in this journey in the form of the phenomenal, though liver-punishing, "1001 Beers You Must Try Before You Die."  Thanks, Kev!  The book recommends the following Welsh beers, by all means drop me a comment if you know where I can find any of these in America:  Brains, Buddy Marvellous, Otley, Snowdonia, Ysprid y Ddraig.

Already this Welsh journey has become a Greek tragedy.  I've been shot down by eight liquor stores so far.  Most recently, I received the following gem of an email reply to my beer inquiry...

Liquor Store Rep:  "My understanding of Wales, England, UK, etc isn't clear.  I know beer not geography, but we have..."  

He proceeded to list sixteen beers:  thirteen from England and three from Scotland.  I'm not at all Welsh, but I found myself feeling oddly insulted.

Enough about beers, let's talk about tigers.  Hull City Tigers that is...

Curtis Davies is a Tiger.  You can tell, because he's dressed in a tiger costume.

Hull City 1 - Cardiff City 1

• Davies (HUL) 40'
• Whittingham (CAR) 59'

Yep, another draw.  This one is particularly unfortunate because as best I can tell if you hope to avoid relegation you must at a minimum beat up on the other newly-promoted teams.  But to their credit, Hull City does seem pretty formidable this season.  Which is understandable, because they play "Eye of the Tiger" during their matches.

Defensively, Cardiff City looked pretty good.  New acquisitions Kevin Theophile-Catherine and Gary Medel both shined.  I was most impressed by the performance of backup goalkeeper Joe Lewis.  Lewis played the entire game instead of David Marshall who was injured during a Wold Cup qualifying match for Scotland.  It's encouraging to know that the Bluebirds have legitimate depth in that position.

Marshall wasn't the only Cardiff City player who had international duties last week.  The following were the other starters who played during the break and their home nations:

• Medel (Chile)
• Bellamy (Wales)
• John (Wales)
• Conway (Scotland)
• Caulker (England)
• Kim (South Korea)
• Gunnarsson (Iceland)
• Gestede (Benin)

One could argue that Cardiff City wasn't at its best due to so many exhausted starters, but Hull City also had players in World Cup qualifiers so I'm not buying that argument.

In terms of offense, it seems like the Bluebirds come back from behind or they don't come back at all.  Thankfully, this was one of the times that they came back...

Campbell and Whittingham Celebrate, Bad Guys Facepalm (Image Credit:  Sky Sports)

Hopefully next week Cardiff City will start their new forward Peter Odemwingie and the offensive production will go up.  And maybe in another month big money signing Andreas Cornelius will finally come back from his ankle injury.  

All that said, a point is a point and the Bluebirds are now in 12th place with 1 win, 2 draws, and 1 loss.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 09/17/13.  The table columns are:  Club Name, Matches Played (Pld), and Ranking Points (Pts).

That's it for reality...let's talk about fantasy!  I'm of course speaking of the Cardiff'rent Strokes and their finest week ever.  Here's the summary of my FPL status:  

• Rank (Last Week):  2,163,420
• Rank (This Week):  1,427,085
• Total Players:          2,915,190

I'm going to try my best not to bore anyone with fantasy sports minutiae in this blog.  But one recent transaction is worth mentioning.  This week I had to fire Cardiff City captain Craig Bellamy from my squad.  It wasn't just because he was benched against the Tigers due to a World Cup qualifier injury.  I've been reading a lot of interviews lately in which he is VERY vocal about retiring at the end of this year due to persistent knee issues.  Felt oddly bad about cutting him, but he's still in the running for when I buy my Cardiff City jersey.

Here's hoping that if this truly is Bellamy's final season, he makes it a memorable one for Cardiff City.

On the plus side, I've hopped on the Whittingham bandwagon and he'll be starting for the Cardiff'rent Strokes next week!

That wraps things up for this week.  Cardiff City's next match is at home against Tottenham Hotspur on September 22nd.

Thank you as always for reading Dragon and Bluebird!  You can find me on Twitter as well, @dragon_bluebird.

Cardiff City vs. Everton: Skor Bars and Scores Barred

When I was growing up, my grandfather was the landlord for a set of apartments he had created out of the upper levels of his house.  He and my grandmother lived on the first floor and when I visited them I would run throughout the building knocking on tenants' doors just to say hello.  One of the tenants was really awesome and used to give me candy.  But not just any candy...Skor bars.  

For the uninitiated, Skor bars are basically rectangular slabs of toffee covered in chocolate.  I can hear you all collectively grimacing; I've come to realize that I'm pretty much the only person in America that likes Skor bars.  To anyone from Britain who may be reading this blog, I believe the closest equivalent to a Skor bar is the Daim bar.  Feel free to comment and let me know if these are popular in your countries!

This childhood memory was dredged up earlier this year when I discovered that Everton's nickname is...you guessed it...the "Skor bars".  No, I'm kidding.  It's the "Toffees".  The nickname derives from a candy called the "Everton Toffee" sold near the original Everton stadium at "Ye Anciente Everton Toffee House" in the 1800s.  Later when Everton moved to a new stadium, the eponymous owner of the nearby "Mother Noblett's Toffee Shop" tweaked the Everton Toffee recipe, called it the "Everton Mint", and started giving it out for free at the soccer matches.  

Everybody loves free candy, and thus Everton fans adopted the nickname of the Toffees.  Fast forward one hundred years to this past Saturday when the Bluebirds collided with the Toffees.  I guess you could say it was a...sticky mess.

Cardiff City 0 - Everton 0

• <crickets chirping>

That's right ladies and gentlemen, a zero-zero draw.  In my very first post I pondered, "...the rest of the world must know something that I don't which could possibly make sitting through a ninety-plus minute game, only to end in a zero-zero draw, worthwhile."  So did I discover that secret?  Maybe.  

Last year, the Toffees placed sixth in the league.  Their roster is filled with talent, and after last week's wake up call to Manchester City no one is going to walk into Cardiff City Stadium underestimating the Bluebirds again.  The fact that the Cardiff City defense managed to hold Everton to zero goals was a minor miracle.  

In the Premier League standings, a win is worth three points, a loss is worth zero points, and a draw is worth one point.  If we're being honest, Everton on paper at least should have beaten Cardiff City.  So I think that the Bluebirds were more than happy to walk away with one point from this snoozefest.  

And this, as best I can tell, is the secret to tolerance of (I still can't imagine saying "enjoyment of") a tie game.  When you're the underdog and you manage to keep up with your opponent for a full game, you take your one point and you do the Scooby Doo run out of that stadium.

Let me be clear though, ties are an abomination.  They're great for keeping you moving up the standings table, but as a competitive person I view a game where nobody wins as a game where everybody loses.

Just for kicks, I did a little digging into the 2012/13 season results.  Apparently, 216 of 380 (57%) matches ended in a tie.  Alarmingly, 35 of 380 matches (9%) ended in a 0-0 tie.

I want you to digest that for a moment, then I want you to imagine the NFL having 57% of its games end in a tie, then I want you to take some Rolaids so you don't get ill.  

If ANYONE is confused about why soccer hasn't taken off as a professional sport in America, this is the reason:  ties are shameful things that happen and we never speak of again.

Enough soccer bashing.  I have been having a blast following this team and ties or no ties I plan to stick with them through the season.

I was only able to watch the first half of the match, but obviously I didn't miss anything.  Cardiff City lost the war of possession yet again, but their defense was strong enough that it didn't matter.  And in fact, I did manage to catch the only moment of the match that the media is actually talking about.  Around forty one minutes into the match, Cardiff City's Gary Medel slide tackled Everton's Leighton Baines (one of my fantasy All Stars I might add).  

I don't know anything about soccer fouls, but apparently you need to at least pretend to be aiming for the ball when you slide tackle someone.  As you can see from the picture below, Medel was nowhere near the ball when he assaulted Baines MMA-style.  Long live Medel!

But here's the catch...the referee didn't call a foul.  Had he done so, Baines would have been awarded a penalty kick and Everton may have gone up on Cardiff City 1-0.

I say may have, but Everton coach Roberto Martinez has not stopped bitching about this missed foul call as if it were a 100% certainty that his team would have gotten a goal from the resulting penalty kick.  I say Roberto needs to shut the hell up.  Here's the Everton record to date this season:

• 2-2 against Norwich City
• 0-0 against West Bromwich Albion
• 0-0 against Cardiff City

Apologies, but if you're team is so crappy that you have to sit around and wait for your opponents to foul you to get a goal, then you need to find a new job.  Baines may or may not have scored on his own if Medel had not slide tackled him.  He may or may not have scored if the referee had awarded a penalty kick.  Who knows?  But what the hell was going on in the other 90 whatever minutes?  One would think that 2012's 6th best premier league team wouldn't have to count on a potential successful penalty kick to be their only source of offense against a newly-promoted team.  

Grab a tissue Martinez, you cry baby.

Cardiff City is now in 11th place, and for the moment out of the relegation discussion.  The table below captures the full Premier League standings as of 09/03/13.  The table columns are:  Club Name, Matches Played (Pld), and Match Points (Pts).

In other news, the Transfer window is now closed.  In a last minute flurry, Cardiff City picked up three new team members:

• Maximiliano Amondarain (Defender)
• Kevin Theophile-Catherine (Defender)
• Peter Odemwingie (Forward)

Odemwingie I get.  Cardiff City have only scored in one of their three games.  And you could fairly argue that, since all of the Bluebirds' goals in that game were at the expense of a clearly disinterested MCI, that future goals will be harder to come by for Cardiff City.  They need all the firepower they can buy.

I'm less clear on why they needed to pick up more defenders, but we'll see how these new guys play into the rotation as the season progresses.  

There will be no blog post next week, the Premier League is on what's called the "International Break".  Basically, this is when players return to their home countries and compete with their national teams for places in the World Cup.  We'll pick back up again with a new post on September 17th.

I suppose the final piece of business is to update you on my woeful fantasy team, the Cardiff'rent Strokes.  After three weeks, we've amassed a total of 124 points.  That's an average of 41 points per week.  For perspective, the leader of the private league I'm in is averaging 63 points per week.  And the leader of the formally-sponsored global league is averaging a whopping 87 points per week.

Obviously, I'm doing something horribly wrong.  Hopefully, I'll have better news to report on that front when next we meet.  FYI, Cardiff City's next game is against Hull City on September 14th.

Thank you as always for reading Dragon and Bluebird!  You can find me on Twitter as well, @dragon_bluebird.